A hardly scientific study by the Guy Whisperer
Leg Bouncing: I am not a trained psychologist, which made it even easier for over five-hundred men to share their darkest secrets with me. But along with their sharing of some pretty surprising information I noticed an almost universal quirk: The Right-Leg Rapid Rumba.
Two minutes after a man would settle into his interviewing seat, his right leg would take on a life of its own. It would start bouncing and jiggling like a jackhammer. Whether he was right-handed or left-handed didn’t seem to matter. His starboard limb would become possessed.
In the past I noticed this phenomena in theaters, classrooms, churches, and waiting rooms. I filed it away in the back of my brain for future study. Now as I traveled the country interviewing men in their man caves, the leg bouncing was present in all its jittery glory. I began to make little footnotes along side their profiles… literally footnotes. I would draw a tiny foot indicating a leg-bouncer.
The only professionals who seem fairly immune to leg-bouncing are physicians. Is there a secret course in leg-bounce prevention taught in med school?
Men don’t usually leg-bounce on airplanes. Could it be because they have given up control to the pilot? Is leg-jiggling a way of maintaining control?
The Guy-Whispering process was an extraordinary experience that dragged on for six years and many thousands of miles. That’s a lot of Rumbas to tolerate. Never once did it occur to me I might be in any danger – physical or emotional. I kept a steady course despite wanting to strangle some of the men, some of the time. I laughed and cried with them – often in the space of a single interview – as I vicariously experienced their joys and fears, and their dreams and nightmares. And watched their right legs become pneumatic drills.
Men do not do this if they are coming on to you. In some part of their brain they know leg-bouncing isn’t sexy.
The larger the gathering, the more leg-bouncing a man will perform. By the end of the evening he is exhausted and does not understand why. Peek under a boardroom table at your next business meeting. The Right-Leg Rumba will be rampant.
Our brains are cross-wired: The right half of our brain controls the left side of our body while the left side tells the right side what to do. The left side of our body conveys information to our more emotional right side. (If you have something loving to say… whisper it into a man’s left ear.) The effect is reversed in left-handed people. I think. Best to try both ears and see which works better.
Subjects in research studies who tapped their fingers on their right hands for one minute became less willing to engage in risky behavior like drinking and driving. A foot works just as well as a finger… they are interchangeable.
Movement on the right side activates the risk-averse left hemisphere. So… perhaps… men who are tapping and bouncing their right leg are subconsciously fighting off the urge to do something risky, for example: correct what you’re saying or ask to leave the room.
There is neat sub-text to my study. See if it works in your situation. Humans have a “left-side cradling bias.” We hold infants so that their heads nestle in our left elbows. This allows our emotional right brain to respond to the babies’ facial expression, thus creating better communication and bonding. Now, transfer that scenario to the bedroom. Does your man prefer you on his left or right side? Is he bonding with you or secretly bouncing his right leg?